Sympathy Pain

It’s valentine’s day. Sarah’s at the show…a show about love and marriage and divorce. I’m with the Binja. He’s asleep right now.

Earlier today, She and I went on a dog watch. Her mom’s daschund got out of the fence. When the phone rang and Sarah asked if I could come help, I didn’t think twice. When it comes to animals, Sarah and I are wired alike. She found him. He had somehow gotten into the woods behind the house.

So, back to the show. There is a song in it that plays in my head when I think of Sarah. I know “A show about Divorce?” Well, yes. not all marriage end in divorce, just half of mine. It happens to be at the beginning of the relationship. It’s right after the first kiss. It reminds me of every kiss we have ever shared…especially our first. I do have to admit that she kissed me first. I was very unsure of the evening, even though earlier that evening, I had been full of piss and vinegar, the end of the evening found me meek and unsure. She kissed me. I wanted to be witty. I wanted to say something. It’s what we guys do.

Don’t kiss me goodbye again

Leave this night clean and quiet

You want the last word

You want me to laugh

But leave it for now

All you can say

All you can feel

Was wrapped up inside that one perfect kiss

Leave it at that:

I’ll watch you turn the corner and go…

And goodbye until tomorrow

Goodbye until the next time you call

And I’ll be waiting

Goodbye until tomorrow

Goodbye till I recall how to breathe

And I have been waiting

I have been waiting for you

I stand on a precipice

I struggle to keep my balance

I open myself

I open myself one stitch at a time

Finally yes!

Finally now!

Finally something takes me away

Finally free!

Finally he can cut through these strings

And open my wings!

So goodbye until tomorrow!

Goodbye until my feet touch the floor

And I will be waiting

I will be waiting!

Goodbye until tomorrow

Goodbye until the rest of my life

And I have been waiting

I have been waiting for you

Waiting for you

Waiting for you

I love her. I still feel flustered and like I should make some crack or say something. Sometimes I do…but when I don’t…wow.