The floor is repaired. New linouleumeum is down. There is dirt and traces of repair guys everywhere…and I think they ate my dinner rolls.

But we are home…be it ever so humble. We slept in our beds last night…not that Tony really cared, but we did. I put clean sheets on the bed and it felt like heaven.

I had not done Tony’s 2am feeding while at the in laws. The first night Grandmother took it, and the second Sarah did. I just felt weird wondering around an unfamiliar house at 2:00am, so I opted out. I actually missed that time with him. It was nice to get back in routine last night…and he gave me a smile when I picked him up outta the crib.

Thanks to the family for putting up with us for a couple days. And thanks to the boarding place for boarding our dogs and taking our money with a smile and a wink. Hopefully the land lord won’t smack me too hard with repair cost…I hope.

We have mold. It’s coming up through the leuno…luenol..linoleum. Anyway, I called our landlord and he thought it was the dryer venting under the house with no escape for the moisture. So he sets up an appointment for his repair man to come over, replace the floor, redirect the vent, and put down new line…lounl…linoleum.

We board the dogs, having them groomed and updated (shots) while they are their. I close the cat in a room with litter box, water, and food. Sarah moves kitchen chairs and counter top stuff. When I leave them to go to work, the workers are about to saw through the floor. So I leave them to it.

I get a phone call a few hours later.

“Mr. Comer, have I caught you at a bad time? Well, it wasn’t the dryer, it’s the dish washing machine. The owner said he didn’t remember that house having a dish washer. Who ever installed it didn’t check for leaks”

I get that weird tunnel hearing and sweat a little.

“Um, I installed the dish washer. There weren’t any leaks when I installed it.”

“Oh, well, didn’t mean to insult you, but theirs a leak in the ‘t’ connection and it has been running down into the floor. Not pointing fingers here, just saying that’s what caused it.”

So now I have to “wait for the dust to settle” as the land lord said, to see what I need to do to compensate for the damage and repair. Hopefully it won’t suck to bad…I love being Mr. Handy sometimes, but this time it bit me on the ass.

And, to top the day off, I call Sarah, and she has a flat. Her sister and she are out doing things, Tony is at home with Grandmother, and she gets a flat. Just on of those days.

I woke up Saturday morning. The house was quite. Tony had woke me up with a couple of grunts transmitted through the intercom.

I got up and made my way to his room. It was another sleepy Saturday morning…and I wasn’t asleep. Then his smile hit me, and I was glad I was the one who had gotten the wake up call.

I changed his diaper, and he gave me the, “why am I not eating” grunt. So I made my way to the kitchen, and he gets louder and less patient for the chef.

I’m missing and shaking his bottle while he grunts and whines some more, and then…silence, followed by different voice, sweet and small.

“It’s all right Tony. Dad’s almost here. It’s alright.”

The commotion has woken Jack, who has is standing beside the changing table, with crazy bed head, holding his little brother’s attention while I complete the gourmet meal of formula.

“Good job, Jack,” I say and he beams with pride. He is so proud to be a big brother..and I’m proud of him.

Tony went to the pediatrician last week. 2 month check up. I use the same group and had to go in for a injury. Fell and sprained my wrist. Thanks for asking. Tony’s doctor said he seemed to be doing great…and his foot looked much better…

I really don’t think about it much. It use to really bother me. I use to worry about how he Now it’s just part of him. We stretch his foot regularly. I do it anytime I feed him or bath him. Just simple stretching. He seems to be holding the foot more normally now. I told Sarah some of it because he had chunky baby legs now, and it can’t flip back like it used too…I think it offended her mommy senses. Belly time also seems to be straightening it. He is pushing off on it more than he use to. It seems to be letting him manage it more.

We take him back to the orthopedic doctor on the 14th. It does look better, but the bone is still severely bowed. If nothing changed with it, there would be no way he could walk on it. I’m curious to hear what the doc has to say.

Until then, we will just keep playing with that lucky foot and looking forward to the day he plays Tiny Tim…What? not PC? well, he’s my son…so there. Actually, it is easier for me to laugh about it than to worry. We trust his doctor, and that really all we can do.

I have hated having all these wonderful pictures of my family and no easy way to share them. I missed the photo albums I grew up with, and now have found an easy and relatively inexpensive way to make some.

I tried another book publishing company and love it…not that I had problems with the last try, this just has more options. My Publisher offers a down loadable program that has different styles of book templates. I chose the “Baby Boy” template and I was off. I loaded pictures I had of Tony and the Family. I was able to choose page layouts and add captions easily. It will also set up the book for you, if you don’t care what order the pictures go in. It took about 10 days from the time I uploaded and ordered the book until it was on my door step. It’s an awesome chance to get those pics off your computer and into a traditional photo book.

And, now, on their home page, you can buy one get one free. I made one for my folks, and the other will go to my sister. And, since the book is saved on my computer, I can easily make one for Tony’s other grandparents(It’s in the works, Mama Brown).

We did find out last night that the resolution needs to be pretty high on your photos. So if you are in the habit of using a lower resolution to save disc space on the camera, you may want to use the higher setting when you are taking pics for publishing.

The book looks awesome. I think this is a great idea, especially with mother’s day coming up…or just as a nice coffee table book.

How to Not Be Annoying

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit
Most of the time, an annoying person doesn’t realize how his or her behavior is perceived the others. If you suspect that you’re annoying others - or you’ve been told you’re annoying and think they might be right, here’s how to avoid the little things that often get on people’s nerves.

Steps

1. Build self confidence. Being insecure can lead to annoying traits. Until you have built your self confidence up don’t try too hard.
2. Break counterproductive habits. If you laugh loudly at everyone’s jokes, even if they’re not all that funny, read up on how to avoid laughing at inappropriate times. Try a different approach - be genuine and be yourself. If people find you annoying when you’re being true to yourself, then you need to find new, more accepting people to be around.
3. Respect boundaries. Everybody has boundaries - you need to learn what they are and try to avoid crossing them. Boundaries vary widely from culture to culture and even from individual to individual.
   • Do not go around poking people constantly or tap their heads. In fact, don’t touch them at all if they don’t like it. Of course if they grant permission, then by all means have fun, but otherwise cut it out before you start.
   • Mind your own business. Avoid butting into a conversation by (for example) saying, “What are you talking about?” If you hear someone talking about something with another person, and you only catch the last sentence, leave it be.
4. Be humble. Just because you’re confident doesn’t mean you have to act like you’re better than anyone else. Don’t do or say things that might let you appear to be arrogant, like bragging about your wealth or success.
   • Do not correct bad grammar/spelling or inaccuracies of others because most people don’t like being corrected.
   • Don’t excessively tell people that their beliefs are wrong, gently and nicely mention that you disagree.
   • Don’t complain all the time. Remember the world does not revolve around you. If you complain too much, others will find you depressing and avoid you. Read up on how to be optimistic.
   • Learn to listen. Conversation is a two way street. If you’re talking constantly, the others will get frustrated and quit trying to communicate with you.
5. Be conscious of your surroundings. Be aware if you are standing in doorways while having a conversation, driving 20MPH in a 40MPH zone, or if your children are being obnoxious in a public place. Consider how your actions are likely to affect the people around you.
6. Learn to read facial reactions and body movements. Pay attention to the facial expressions and body language of those around you and work to immediately whatever you’re doing that is annoying others.
7. Think of others. For some it is easy, but others, it is not. Try to put yourself in others’ shoes and treat others the way you would like to be treated.

Tips

• It is easy to be annoying if you talk too much. Think about what you say before you say it. Remember the famous quotation, “It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt”. Not talking at all is no fun for anyone, so you should try to strike a balance of conversation.
• Don’t know if you are annoying? Ask a person that you would find likely to give you an honest and constructive answer. Be prepared for criticism and be willing to accept it gratefully. The person may not be ready to give the criticism immediately so give him/her time by explaining your situation, thoughts, and feelings to make it clear you can handle helpful criticism.
• Don’t ask too many people if you are annoying, as they will probably find this to be quite annoying.

Related wikiHows

• How to Have Good Manners
• How to Know if You Are Irritating
• How to Be a Good House Guest
• How to Stop Swearing
• How to Cope With an Annoying Friend

Article provided by wikiHow, a collaborative writing project to build the world’s largest, highest quality how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Not Be Annoying. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

A few weeks ago Tony and I were up for one of our nightly feedings. (yes I would eat too…a practice I have stopped) Anyway, he was almost asleep, and I stood up to take him to bed, figuring I would have to do some swaying, patting, and humming. As I stood up, I guess my dunlap syndrome belly pinched his foot and he went off. It sounded like I had jerked his arm off. I felt horrible…and he was just screaming. Oh damn…but then, when the crying stopped after a couple minutes, he was asleep…and stayed that way. I felt bad that i had caused him pain…or scared him…but man I was happy he was asleep.

So last night, he ate, it was 2:45, and I was trying to put him down. He was squirming but mostly asleep. I had swaddled him and he had pulled his Houdini impression and already was free. I thought if I could get a pacifier in him, he would calm down and drift off. Unfortunately, I dropped the pacifier right on his forehead, and it sounded like I had ripped his bottom lip off…but after a about a minute and a few pouts, he was out, and sleep well.

And now I know how to put the baby down…pain. Maybe it’s a defense mechanism…like playing opossum. “If he thinks I’m asleep, he won’t hurt me anymore.” Now, you may not be heartless enough to try this out, or you might be afraid department of child services will dome take your child…but at least you will be well rested.

Ok, so it’s just Excema, but damn…He’s had, what we thought…and was diagnosed originally…was heat rash. Turns out, after his 2 month checkup, it’s eczema. It never seemed to bother him, but was not attractive. We’ve changed to the Nestle natural cultures formula a few weeks ago, and recently started using Aveeno extreme care baby wash. The doc also gave Sarah a voodoo recipe for an at home concoction. He is doing much better after only a week. His skin is almost clear and is soft as a baby’s…wait a tick, that’s redundant.

I did read, and have been told, that eczema can be connected to food allergies and, in some odd way, be a foreshadowing sign of asthma. Ain’t that something. It’s like a cruel, predestined, nerd trio. Food allergies, bad skin, and asthma. If he had been born with am inhaler and pocket protector, it would have been complete.

But we are diligent. We are using the right lotion and baby wash now. However, my wife does miss his “sweet baby” smell that comes from the scented baby wash. She may sacrifice the skin to get the baby smell back. And, my mother-in-law wants to use hydrochloric acid on him…read up.

Super Nanny. 6 kids. They had 6 kids. They decided to have 6 kids. the oldest, and only male, was 14. The youngest was probably around 2.

Mom had given up. The dad owned his own business, and wasn’t there much. Jo’s big thing was…”You decided to have 6 children. You wanted to be a mom. Be a mom.” She would complain about the oldest girl being out of control. The 3 oldest would kick and hit and spit each other. Sometimes they would spit on the mom. Mom would just go into the office and …I don’t know. Just escape. She even did it in the middle of her 2 year old having a tantrum about time out.

“Be a mom”

The kids also had fowl mouths. No I cuss like a sailor, but not at 5. And it seemed they learned it from mom. Jo actually came down to her level and called her excuses “bullshit” it was awesome. This was about the time that we learned the dad was trying. He seemed to have no idea that his wife was a shell of a mother.

Jo had the oldest girl and mom go bowling. The hope was they would connect and may have some physical and emotional connection. Jo kept trying to get the mom to hug her daughter…or a pat on the back…nothing. Just a high five…once.

I always are amazed at those people who have kids and think it’s going to be a walk in the park. especially those who have multiple kids. I would think by the first few, you would figure things out and STOP HAVING KIDS!

Of course, Jo broke the ice. The family became closer. I just hate that it has to get to that point. I don’t really understand how it gets that far. Again…if you want to be a parent…be a parent.

It’s valentine’s day. Sarah’s at the show…a show about love and marriage and divorce. I’m with the Binja. He’s asleep right now.

Earlier today, She and I went on a dog watch. Her mom’s daschund got out of the fence. When the phone rang and Sarah asked if I could come help, I didn’t think twice. When it comes to animals, Sarah and I are wired alike. She found him. He had somehow gotten into the woods behind the house.

So, back to the show. There is a song in it that plays in my head when I think of Sarah. I know “A show about Divorce?” Well, yes. not all marriage end in divorce, just half of mine. It happens to be at the beginning of the relationship. It’s right after the first kiss. It reminds me of every kiss we have ever shared…especially our first. I do have to admit that she kissed me first. I was very unsure of the evening, even though earlier that evening, I had been full of piss and vinegar, the end of the evening found me meek and unsure. She kissed me. I wanted to be witty. I wanted to say something. It’s what we guys do.

Don’t kiss me goodbye again

Leave this night clean and quiet

You want the last word

You want me to laugh

But leave it for now

All you can say

All you can feel

Was wrapped up inside that one perfect kiss

Leave it at that:

I’ll watch you turn the corner and go…

And goodbye until tomorrow

Goodbye until the next time you call

And I’ll be waiting

Goodbye until tomorrow

Goodbye till I recall how to breathe

And I have been waiting

I have been waiting for you

I stand on a precipice

I struggle to keep my balance

I open myself

I open myself one stitch at a time

Finally yes!

Finally now!

Finally something takes me away

Finally free!

Finally he can cut through these strings

And open my wings!

So goodbye until tomorrow!

Goodbye until my feet touch the floor

And I will be waiting

I will be waiting!

Goodbye until tomorrow

Goodbye until the rest of my life

And I have been waiting

I have been waiting for you

Waiting for you

Waiting for you

I love her. I still feel flustered and like I should make some crack or say something. Sometimes I do…but when I don’t…wow.

I’ve written about my realtionship with my ex- before. It may not be the stereotypical divorced with child relationship, and I think we are lucky that way. However, this sometimes leads to strangeness, especially where her family is involved.

Little expositional info. Her family is large and extremely close. It took me about 2 years to get down how belonged to whom and where the family tree forked and such. I come from a small to medium sized family, and we are just close enough. Nobody in our back yard to check out our dirty laundry. We see each other on major holidays and send cards. The ex family mostly live in the same zip code and their are easily 25 family members in a 20 mile radius. I never have more than 4 in a 100 mile radius. And they like each other an are extremely loyal.
Sounds great, right. Well it is…if your apart of it. So, one of few things I hated about the divorce was loosing her family. Lawyer, Dentist, Chiropractor, pediatric nurse, construction contractor…all in my cell phone.
So now, years after the divorce, our story begins.

Saturday, during a peaceful walk with my family, after working on Jack’s “Valentine Box”, the phone rings. It’s Jack’s bio-mom’s mom…Nanny. I think some thing’s wrong. Maybe the bio-mom has been attacked by a Hydra…or something. No, she just wanted to check on Tony and Sarah and, after prompting, said hey to Jack. felt strange, but Nanny is an extremely nice person, so I shrugged it off. She has even offered to watch Tony…again, nice but kinda odd.

Then, last night we took jack home. Bio-mom was at a relative’s house. The patriarchal head of the clan. So we stop to drop him off, and Nanny descends on the car, insisting we bring Tony in for the family to see. We are way off in the docks…I had a feeling we were about to become some domestic violence statistic. However, the ex- family was extremely sweet and loved that Tony bot. They also wanted to take photos of the binja…again, the baby not related to them. He is Jack’s brother, but there is no blood relationship back to this family tree, so it was just odd.

Well, we made it out…but the pucker factor was high. I admit I am blessed to have the kind of relationship I do with my ex-, but it really was odd to stand on the orange shag carpet I had grown accustom to over the 9 years of marriage, and hear my ex- say, “this is Sarah, Bryan’s wife and their baby, Tony.” Very twilight zone.

Wow…
That’s all I can say.

I had a couple moments tonight that made me realize I am a father of the new generation. No more coming home to slippers and a pipe, Mr. Beaver…he he, I said beaver.

The first was as my oldest ask me if I had seen “Jurassic Park.” I was slightly taken aback, thinking it was a little graphic for a 7 year old, but I said yes.

“The t-rex is kinda scary.”

“Yep”

“Especially to be related to a chicken.” Yes, that is the latest theory, that T-rex’s closest relative is the chicken…my 7 year old knew that…did you? I remember hearing that in high school…when I was 15.

The second was with the same boy, as he was wearing my blue tooth ear bud and watching the Muppet’s on my cell phone. It was slight surreal and…dear I say it…very yuppy-ish. At least I didn’t vote republican. And, at least, it was the muppets…Fozi telling bad jokes and being heckled by Waldorf and Stadler.

And the last was tonight with the baby. My wife is at dress rehearsal for the show she is the assistant director for. Which means she’s not here in the evening…and about to fall out from exhaustion. But anyway, back to the moment. I had just finished boiling pacifiers and steaming bottles, and was feeding Tony on the couch. I was watching T.V. Was it ESPN or CNN or even SPIKE? No, I was watching “Project Runway” on BRAVO. Metro-sexual much? They were dressing the WWE Diva’s…who are hot.

Well, that’s my view of fatherhood in the new millenium. My father just felt his manhood take a blow…easy, that’s my dad your thinking about.

Wow. I am amazed almost daily at the amount of parents who don’t buckle their child in. I wish I had the power to call them in for a ticket. That would be awesome…they get a citation in the mail that starts…”Dear stupid breeder”.
Now, honestly I didn’t wear a seat belt regularly until I was 10 or 12, and the worse that happened to me was a broken jaw and a scar on my forhead. I mean, that was back in the 70’s and 80’s when children were tougher…I guess. But now, we know better.

But this kills me…I hope that was some good beer. Just another pet peeve of mine.

ST. AUGUSTINE, Fla. - Police have arrested a motorist they say had a 24-pack of beer strapped in with a seat belt but had a 16-month-old girl unrestrained in the back seat with the toddler’s mother.

Tina D. Williams was pulled over in St. Augustine on Sunday for allegedly running a red light.

A 24-pack of Busch beer was strapped in with the passenger-side seat belt, according to an arrest report. The girl was in the back seat with 20-year-old Amber Tedrick, who is the toddler’s mother.

Williams, 46, said she didn’t know why the child wasn’t restrained.

Williams refused to take a breath test and a deputy found two metal pipes commonly used to smoke drugs in her purse, authorities said.

Williams was charged with driving under the influence, child abuse, possession of drug paraphernalia and driving without a license, a jail official said. She remained in the St. Johns County jail Tuesday after bail was set at $31,000.

The jail did not have the name of her attorney. It was not clear if Tedrick would face any charges, but the child was released to her care, according to The Florida Times-Union.